Ah, the fresh breeze of freedom is upon me once again. The end to another semester, and the opportunity to lay around in a robe, watch films and scratch...well you get the picture. Okay, so I do still have to go to work, but after this fall, that is a piece of cake. It has been incredibly draining, but I did accomplish a fair amount.

I needed a break from all this to gather my energy once again, but I'd like to try to keep posting, if nothing else, for myself, to keep those creative juices flowing.

Heading to Puerto Rico in a few weeks for a much needed vacation. I do hope to take a lot of photos while I'm there. I have a direction, but we'll see what actually comes out of it. Until next time, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to those of you who celebrate. enjoy, and be safe. Do things that i wouldn't do, and take pictures of it. Don't forget to post them!

an end result, offering the desired effect. a conclusion, of sorts. is work ever done? sleepless nights upon sleepless days, medicating as seen fit, taking the edge off, or at least dulling the full scope of what has been done. the road, more than half complete, leaves an indeterminate trail. no way to see where I am going, or where I have been. feeding the mind, starving the body, or is it the other way around? an uncertain verisimilitude offers the prospect of profligate disregard. a folly of contentions, wishing that you weren't the only one, laying blame to a disparate source of insecurity. has it been worth it? you might ask yourself, impossible to answer, but curiosity has killed the cat, maimed the horse and slaughtered the calf, a fattened one no less. time will tell, if it does not first flee the scene, precipitously seeking its own demise.

Wrapped up shooting on the doc project on Friday. Ultimately, I think it will work, but it was an ordeal to get what I needed. I'm in the process of logging the tape I just shot and beginning to lay some material down. I'm hoping to have some sort of rough cut in another week or so. Something to look at and then bring it to completion from there. Each project is a learning experience. This one was more of a challenge due to potential legal issues. I just need to hire some people to handle this shit.

I have been trying as much as possible to get back to watching as much film as I can. It has been at the sacrifice of other things, but it has been fruitful to just watch more, in particular, documentaries. There is a lot of interesting work being done out there, and it's instructive to see the working methods of others, whether recent or not. I just saw a very provocative documentary called The Bridge. The filmmakers spent a year following the stories of people that have jumped of the Golden Gate bridge to their death. Very interesting to see how someone approaches a subject as difficult as that. I also have just made my way through the all of the Up films. I had seen 7 Up and 14 Up a few years ago. Very interesting to see a series of films made over the span of over 40 years in a matter of weeks. Well worth the time. Whether watching new things or rewatching things I had seen years ago, it has helped me to keep moving forward in developing ideas.

So, I've been away a while. Trying to keep my concentrated effort on the book and the doc that I'm working on. I'm hoping tomorrow is the day I finally am able to wrap shooting on the funeral director project. I have been jumping through hoops to get in to shoot my subject working, but legal issues have brought that to a standstill. I'm hopeful that I have worked through it. In the meantime, I have finished logging sound and I am writing and gathering media to edit. So, it is coming together, slowly, as it seems always happens. I have also been involved with the book during that down time. I'm pleased with the image layouts, Just finalizing text so I can do the layouts for that, then print this baby and assemble it.

is there guilt in laying in wake for the pestilence to take life? there is no relishing this act, only solace in the knowledge of some truth that emerges. the dead will march on, regardless of my presence. is it poetry to commit this to memory? there is no room for poetry here. only pure emotion. pour it out onto the tableau of contrivance, then sop it up with withering napkins. illegitemacy is the song of the day. leftist movements take over my mind, tell it to reshape, but there is no traction with this method. captive is my audience. left broken by the tragedy of it all. symbiotic in its pose. all in all, a worthwhile juncture for listing the effects of an ever mounting file of circumstantial evidence. fiduciary responsibility aside, the scales have tipped in your favor, weighing on my conscience with a feather's magnitude.

the production of fresh kill, blessed with a vigil of cumbersome eunuchs, at odds with the universe, and unlike anything that has come before. who says originality is dead? it can always be stolen, for a price. the incessant workings of inner spatial desire, uncanny by any standard. sanitary missions of unrelenting ambivalence leave me unrewarded. elbow grease withstanding, there is little traction for this path of least resistance. an unwarranted level of establishment within the cirle of constabulary rancor creates rumored departure for the typically fruitful endeavors of the villified masses. unschooled in the ways of fervently pious anti-cranial blasphemy, marching to the beat of untold truths, sychophantic, yet not without reproach for the lesser known prodigals. it all comes out in the wash.



a new ending discovered, for untold works, as yet realaized, with elements coming together in ways beyond simple expostion. best diplayed for discernable meaning. the direction is promising. notes on a cognitive flow have been tabluated. drafting is forthcoming.



further evidence of progress reads as such: electronic incoding of impluses through which sound and pictures produce coherent narratives expected imminently. there is no time to waste on discussion. the need for compelling evidence becomes increasingly necessary by the day. the material is guaranteed not to disappoint, subject to legal disclaimers offering no promise of complete or even partial satisfaction. void where prohibited.

4:18 AM

a pedestrian struck, a shooting, a car into a house and another bullshit mva later, my egg sandwich was missing the egg, coffee was stale and in need of doctoring, and donut left something to be desired, but other than that, I feel satiated. thank you tim horton's for another quality experience. sorry, just had to get that out.

watching some films lately, a few docs here and there, currently in the midst of Zodiac. on the non-fiction tip, i am struck mostly by the quality of stories out there, coupled with the lack of quality in terms of the technique. recently viewed 51 Birch St., and while I found the subject to be worthwhile, I am always amazed at the visible inequities of production value. i'm not talking about hollywood blockbuster special effects mind you, but simply well placed lights, cutaways, decent sound quality. started Grizzly Man, but got interrupted. Herzog is adept at both fiction and non-fiction, so I look forward to finishing. i'm also in the midst of "The War", ken burns' latest epic. the jury is out.

on my own project front, i have gathered some contacts on the funeral director project. plan on making a few calls and potentially beginning to shoot this week, hopefully will have some raw for midsemester at the very least.

notes on a film, or 3

I'm posting the film treatments for my three possible documentary subjects here for comments and ideas. Mainly, if anyone has any contacts or leads in these areas, please forward them to me.

1. Funeral Director

What are the emotional issues involved in the job? Is it possible to separate business from the personal dealings with clients? How do you comfort someone who is distraught and still take care of the business end? Where do you draw the line so you are not too emotionally involved? What are the conflicts involved in a business where you depend on death to survive? Ie. Death is good for business. What is it like to see kids getting killed on the street or in war, perhaps kids you know, then having to prepare them for burial?

2. Migrant Stories

A documentary series of short vignettes, possibly for working into a longer piece in the future, focusing on the following issues:
A. Follow one family’s/individual’s struggle to find work and make a living. The legal issues, fear, desperation, cultural barriers. Where have they traveled from and why did they come all this way to work? What are conditions like at home? What is the work like? Are there any alternatives?
B. The church- how have they facilitated people coming here? What have they done to ease the transition? Why is it important to support this? What part does religion and spirituality play? Is it more of an issue of justice and charity?
C. Farmers- how much do they depend on migrant workers? Legal issues? Are they afraid of reprisals?


3. Islamic Fundamentalism-Perceptions

What forms of discrimination do you face based upon your religion? Is it outwardly evident? Do you avoid or dread certain situations, change behavior when you anticipate discrimination, eg. an airport? Is it hard to practice your faith in a culture where you are in the minority? What changed for you after 9/11, Iraq invasion? Have you questioned your faith? How do you explain your belief system to skeptical outsiders who see Islam as a religion of violence?

a sampling of images


shot these over the weekend for a book project. working with some of the ideas previously discussed. beginning to lay them out into page spreads, figuring out sizes. eventually, i'll be adding text, which i plan to write in several drafts. i will be posting those as well to get feedback, particularly from the female perspective, since the character is female.

up and strolling....briskly

my thoughts in two folds:

first fold-to produce sequential image sets that begin to expore the boundaries between the still image and the moving image. this process will involve the shooting of a simple action, broken down into its basic elements, fragmenting it, that is, focusing on small parts of the action, with attention to the details, the overlooked minutiae. placing these together side by side in book form so that one image does not reveal much of anthing, but together they tell the story of what is happening within the whole of the sequence.

second fold-approach is to shoot the entire sequence wide, without moving the camera, rapidly working the shutter to reveal through a slight progression exaclty what is being accomplished. In book form, this will be presented in such a way that the viewer much be tempted to treat it as a flip book, but will be constructed in such a way that it is conducive only to be viewed image by image, with eyes lingering over each frame. Each image has a beauty unto itself, but is tied to the sequence through the slow progression of this event.

lingering thoughts of dedicating this to black and white reversal in time....

but all is not lost with the moving image for now. lists and documentations under microscopic review, but ameobas swim through my view, clouding the process. treatments forthcoming, the jury is out, but accomodations were said to be well appointed.

with no new images to share yet, sear your eyes on these back burners; haven't decided if there is any direction for them.

thoughts for food, endless sustenance comes in the form of bite-sized nuggets of cerebral victuals. who would want for anything with a diet such as this, high in moral fiber, yet a delectble assorment of guilty pleasures mixed in.

onward soldiers trudge, tallying new conquests, in their wake, a heap of alarms, impeding new progress, untold mysteries hide around the nook and the crannies. they go unfound, because none of them know quite what a cranny looks like. energy wanes. soon they fall, one by one, in a massive pile of might. mental or otherwise. but fear not. the saga continues through a REM induced coma. the visuals are quite impressive though unseen by the naked eye, or the clothed for that matter. though the naked is more appealing.

we shan't be but a moment in our thoughts. we'll emerge on the other side, amused, enlightened, and viciously unimpressed i assume. it may not make sense to you. but someday it will. sit far off for a moment and let the capricorns wash over you for a spell, then for a while, then a moment more. if something doesn't become clear, then you clearly are not trying hard enough.

tides will turn, then eras, with bleach no less. the horse has been led, but no amount of cajoling will convince him to drink a drop. if not for that then his thirst surely will later, rather than sooner.

a new beginning, returning to old haunts. revamped. rethought. reflected. after months left neglected. untold amounts of backlog detected. steam is felt fully about the head. the trick is keeping it at hand for sustained periods. time stamps will bear this out. best intentions have carried no one to fruition of cause. lingering doubts dampen efforts, yet optimism wins the day. bet on reality to place and logistics to show. ticket stubs scattered about the beer drenched concrete beneath dead air of silent swagger. the debtors have prevailed. remittance is gathered promptly. steady work requires kneecaps entact.